Confucanism, and skincare, and kimchi… oh my! Here are my first impressions of South Korea.
Couples
One of my very first impressions of South Korea is that it is the land of couples.
In Korea it’s called “couple culture.” You can see it everywhere, identifiable by matching shirts (or full outfits – no kidding), cuddling, and cafe dates where they each take copious amounts of selfies (selca in Korean).
Age
If you weren’t already aware, the age hierarchy in Korea is taken very seriously. There’s formal speech and informal speech but formal speech must always be used for those older than you unless you get permission to speak informally or you’re aiming to be rude.
The age hierarchy plays heavily into your personal relationships. If you’re older, you’re expected to be the responsible one and pay for things for the younger ones in the group. If you’re younger, you’re expected to be somewhat servile to those who are older. Allowing them to have or do things first, cleaning up after them, maybe even running errands.
It also plays heavily into friendships. What struck me as very odd in Korea was that people who are the same age can be friends but people who aren’t cannot. Of course this can vary among the types of people you meet but you’ll see an overwhelming number of people with friends the same exact age.
Drinking
South Korea is a country full of people who love to drink and are great at it. Have fun, but also realize that if you’re drinking with native Koreans, there are some rules you should follow.
For instance, the youngest person in a group should pour drinks for everyone. The youngest should also tilt their head away from the eldest as a sign of respect. It is your role to be polite to those older than you. Don’t worry though, the eldest will usually pay for the drinks as their “role”.
Service
Getting “service” in Korea means getting free stuff. It’s awesome.
It usually happens when you’ve ordered a large amount of whatever it is you are buying. If you’re at a BBQ place, they’ll probably give you something like a stew or noodle dish or even drinks. If you’re at a skincare store, they’ll give you free masks.
They do this to reward customers for big purchases and to get them to come back. I mainly received service at a vegan bakery I found near Yonsei University. Vegan desserts aren’t a big thing in Korea yet and I was desperate for a cookie or cupcake. Once I found it and started coming back with big purchases, they would throw in two cookies or a large piece of cake for free!
Manners
One doesn’t think of the USA being a place that is particularly well known for its manners (what with the gentleman culture in England and the “sorry” stereotype in Canada) but living in Korea made me miss the little polite mannerisms that Americans have. For instance, holding the door open. That isn’t a thing in Korea, they will let the door hit you in the face. This happened to me many times even when I was on crutches and was one of my more negative impressions of South Korea.
Seoul is a very crowded city with many people, and as such you will get hit by people’s shoulders and bags as you walk through the city – and don’t expect an apology. In restaurants, people will chew loudly and slurp to their hearts content (this is actually good manners in Korea, showing the meal is good), but I had a very hard time with it.
Smoking
There’s so much smoking. You can smoke in hotels and clubs and during class people would literally leave for a smoke break because they couldn’t wait until class ended.
English
Around half of the signs you see will be in English. Koreans learn English in school and most are pretty good at it, but are notorious for being shy about speaking it and thinking they aren’t good enough to converse, even though they are.
Learn a few easy Korean phrases and people are usually very kind about helping you out despite the language barrier.
Trashcans
There are no trashcans in public. Ever.
How does South Korea stay so clean when there are literally no public trashcans outside anywhere? Do people just hold their trash for hours?
Umbrellas
Most people always carry an umbrella, especially in the summer. Summer is monsoon season and when it rains, it pours. But on the other hand, even when it’s not raining you’ll see a sea of umbrellas held by women to block the sun from their face.
Dating Apps
Tinder isn’t really a thing to be taken seriously in Korea. Most profiles only have two pictures and no bio, which I’m still not sure is an aesthetic thing or what. Half of the Korean guys will use it as a language exchange program and the other half are sleazy.
A small percentage are good guys who just want to take you on a date. However, in Korea there’s a thing called “riding the white horse,” which I’ll leave you to your imagination on what that means. Many guys will try to pick you up as an experience, rather than because they actually want to date you. Other guys on Tinder are American soldiers stationed there or other students.
The Humidity
Korea in summer = death by humidity and heat. I have very thick, long hair and within an hour, my hair completely frizzed out and was twice its normal size. Keeping your hair up and away from your face in braids (or buns if you have less hair than me) is a must.
Mosquitos
They will kill you. Stay out late during the summer without bug spray and you will wake up with seven different bites from that night. You will also get bitten on the face, as I was 5 times.
Skincare
If you’re already familiar with Korea, you will know that South Korea is obsessed with skincare. Having clean, dewy, white skin in Korea is desired above all else and Koreans will go to great lengths to achieve this. There are dozens of little shops littered around every block where you can buy relatively cheap products. Skinfood, the Face Shop, Etude House, and Tony Moly are some such places that are popular for skincare products.
Important! – For those who do not want skin whitening in their products, be sure to mention that to clerks or to scan labels carefully.
The Subway
Honestly the best subway system I’ve ever been on. Very clean and easy to get around and understand, even if you don’t know Hangul (the Korean alphabet).
Volume
Going to Korea made me realize how loud Americans generally are. We were constantly shushed on public transportation. Young Koreans are taught to be quiet and respectful of their volume from a young age, however once you become a ajumma (older Korean lady) this doesn’t seem to apply anymore.
Sexism
I’ve already written a post about this topic, but I’ll briefly speak about it here as it was another of the more negative first impressions I had of South Korea.
In my opinion, girls are treated as second class citizens here more so than any other place I’ve ever been. Obviously there are other places in the world that are worse, but S. Korea is such an industrialized nation with many advancements that surpass other major world powers. However, they have not advanced in their viewpoints on how women should be treated and in fairness.
A large part of this is due to it’s Confucianist background, where women had a strict set of morals and “rules” to live by. Some of which included obedience to men above all else, meaning a dutiful wife and daughter was all they could aspire to. By definition in Confucianism, women are weak and passive whereas men are powerful and active.
Obviously I received a different treatment in Korea as a tall (imposing) foreign woman – but there were still definite red flags in how I noticed they treated me compared to my male friends.
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Any questions? Contact me or comment below!